But the doctor said so! by Nicole

It's hard having a sick child. especially when they are too young to tell you what hurts, how it hurts and what you can do for them. Yesterday was a rough day but I walked away from it (covered in vomit and poop) thinking very positively of Trent and my team work, and making the best choice for the health of our daughter.

Ila's appetite has been somewhat small the last few days. Trent has noticed a lot of gagging while eating and drinking as well, and extra fake coughs from her. She has also had diarrhea off and on for the last week and a fever here and there. She also cut a tooth 4 days ago. Her diarrhea the last few days had been different from the days previous though. Yesterday morning, after breakfast we loaded up in the car and Ila threw up all over. It was nasty, but we got her out of her car seat, took her inside and changed her, and loaded her back up and went to church. Most parents are probably cringing right now, since we took our child to church and let her play in the nursery with all the other kids, while carrying this bug around with her. I will say though that we honestly did not think (at the time) she threw up because she was sick, we just thought she gaged on something or just had too much to eat.

During church, Ila's number flashed on the little box by the sanctuary. That meant that Ila needed my assistance. When I went into the nursery, she was standing on the changing table (with a 80+ year old woman holding her) crying and looking uncomfortable. They younger woman/mother of 6 was also in there looking frazzled. I went and grabbed Ila and they showed me that there was poo up her back. "Oh yuck!" I said. "Thank you for calling me in, I wouldn't wish this diaper change on anyone but my husband!" We all had a good laugh and I got Ila all cleaned up and changed. It was some nasty diarrhea, whitish in color.

The rest of the afternoon while shopping, Ila was acting fussy. She did not want to have anything to do with Daddy and was barely tolerating me. I fed her and she took a nap. Woke up from the nap and spewed all over herself & car seat. Okay, something is wrong with her. Trent and I discussed that we though there must be something in her throat causing her to gag. So we tried looking, and that caused her to throw up a lot more. So, off to the doctor we went. We had limited choices as it was 4pm on Sunday. We went into the waiting room and waited for an hour. Ila didn't really like that, and fussed for most of it.

The not so friendly, very shaky and ready for retirement aged nurse came and got us and did they whole nurse thing. My favorite par twas when she left the room she said, "The doctor will be in." Not, "the doctor will be in shortly." And good thing she didn't! We are estimating it was about another 20 minutes till the doctor came round. He did his thing and didn't find anything wrong with her. Then he said, "well, we'll get a urine sample to test for a kidney infection." Then walked out of the room.

the next 20 minutes Trent and I discussed how exactly they would go about getting a urine sample. I said "with a catheter" and Trent said, "we could just ring her diaper out!" Well, they couldn't ring out her diaper (and they probably wouldn't if they could), since she hadn't peed in a few hours, or kept anything down. Well, we expected the doctor to come in with a catheter, but the nurse and some other lady (probably another nurse) came in instead. We did not have any idea why they needed a urine sample, what signs she was showing that could lead the doctor to thinking she had a kidney infection etc. We were NOT about to let them give Ila a catheter without having a few things explained to us. We asked them what they were planning on doing, and why. Then I asked what the side effects/ risks were, "is there a chance of infection?" I asked. Unfriendly nurse rolls her eyes and snapped of course there is a chance of infection! There is anytime you insert something into the body!" I give her the look, and Trent says sternly but kindly "we're going to need to talk to the doctor again before you do that." They grumble and walk out.

Now I'm mad and ready to just leave. Trent, my awesome and wise husband suggests we talk to the doctor before leaving. We discuss together, while we wait, how we don't see a reason for the catheter and urine sample. Then we call Trent's mom, a nurse of 20+ years and she tells us why the doctor wants the sample, and discusses it with Trent etc. The doctor comes back in 15 minutes later) and we have a little chat. He says "well, it's most likely a flu. You can tell by how she is acting, they she is not in much pain and she doesn't have a fever. I can't tell 100% for certain without testing for other things that it is the flu, but I'm sure it probably is." We discussed signs to watch for in the next couple of days that would tell us if it's something more serious. We decided NOT to get a urine sample as it seemed quite unnecessary for something that is probably a flu. Other possibilities are a kidney infection, an obstruction (which is what Trent and I are thinking it is, if it's not the flu) or some sort of liver problem. The main concern at this point is dehydration, but she seems to be doing pretty well in that camp and the white stools. Don't google "white stools" because it is all doom and gloom. It is something to watch closely for sure, but it could also just be a symptom of the flu, according to the doctor.

As we made our 1 hour drive home I was so pleased that we didn't put Ila through something as traumatic and painful as a catheter for something that probably the flu. I was really pleased with the unity Trent and I had in making good choices for the health of our daughter. I was NOT pleased with the ease the doctor and staff had about getting a urine sample from Ila. I cannot believe that the doctor didn't have conversation #2 with us BEFORE sending in the catheter team. We could have saved all of us 30-45 minutes, and a whole lot of patience and warm fuzzy feelings. The only real good thing about the experience was when they told us they would not charge us for the visit. That was a total blessing from God, as we are 2 months away from our insurance with Trent's work starting up, therefore uninsured!

To sum up, we are thankful for doctors and their wisdom, but parents need to make wise and informed decisions about the health care their children are getting. We should not make medical decision just because "the doctor said so!" We are still a bit concerned about Ila, but she seems to be happily playing and drinking and eating. Please pray that it really is only the flu and that she is healthy again soon!

I forgot to tell you my favorite part about the whole thing. Since we live an hour outside of town I have to have super prepared and stocked diaper bag. By the time we got to the doctor, Ila was wearing her ONLY unsoiled piece of clothing (other then her diaper of course), a sweatshirt. She had no pants left so we wrapped her up in a blanket. It was kind of embarrassing.