Two years ago we were living in Korea, my mom had just had neck surgery and I was 23 weeks pregnant. I received a phone call from my best friend, and she had terrible news. There was a fire at an apartment that Sarah, a good friend of ours lived in, and Sarah had been found dead inside. Over the course of the next week many things started to unfold and spiral down. The autopsy report found that she had died before the fire and that she was 20 weeks pregnant with a little girl. Her husband, a friend of ours as well, was arrested for murdering his pregnant wife and arson.
I miss my friend very much, and I dealt with some of that this week while I was in Moscow visiting friends. I drove by San Miguel's, a restaurant in Moscow that Sarah and I frequented together. It had just gone out of business and I was filled with emotion as I imagined our little girls, just a few weeks apart in age playing with each other as Sarah and I ate delicious tacos and talked like no time had passed since I saw her last. That's how it always was with Sarah, time apart never affected the closeness she had with her friends.
I miss her dearly, and I hate what happened to her. I still struggle with wh
at happened, I struggle with my feelings toward Silas, her husband and murdered and at a time in life, my friend, and I struggle with what could have been. I think that is normal though. Several of my friends from Moscow were close to Sarah as well, and we all seem to feel the same way and struggle with the same things.
It's important to mention and remember Sarah's faith though. She was a God loving, God fearing and God following individual. Passionate about loving others, doing what was right, and seeing the potential in everyone. She was a strong woman, a prayerful woman and a great friend. She would have been a fantastic mom, and I know I'm not alone in wishing I could have seen that. But I know that Sarah is at home now, right where she belongs, praising the Lord for eternity.
I miss you friend, and I wish our time together could have been longer!
Thanks for posting this, Nicole; wish I could give you a hug! Love you!
ReplyDeleteWish I could hug you too! :)
ReplyDeleteThis was such a difficult thing to deal with. I remember I was pregnant with Eric at the same time. It is hard to believe it has been 2 years. I didn't know Sarah that well, but the few times I did meet her, she was a sweet and welcoming person. I think this is something we will never know why it happened, but like you said, she is resting at home with her Father and her baby girl. (((hugs)))
ReplyDeleteI love you Nicole. I wish I could take away the pain, but I would never wish Sarah back. She's in such a better place! Lylyly
ReplyDeleteI didn't know Sarah very well but I remember spending time with her when we came for your wedding and catching random moments of chatting at the mall. Such a sweet spirited woman who had an ability to reach out to anyone and make them feel special. I don't think it's "strange" that she has come to mind recently. My heart hurts for those close to her. The pain of the loss will come and go with memories but the reality of the hope we have in Christ is daily.
ReplyDeleteThanks for that Kristin! :)
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